Curse of the Madison children

Birthdays are really no fun anymore. They used to be filled with friends and family and fun. As I have gotten older, I have realized that I no longer look forward to my birthday. My birthday for the past couple of years have really been downers. I hate birthdays. I dread my 19th coming up in a few days.
My brother and I must have a curse. We both have sat at home our past two birthdays. His 21st, he sat at home due to a surgery he had, same with this year on his 22. He just sat at home because he really couldn't do much. Two birthdays sitting at home with his foot proped up. Not what i call a Happy Birthday. Me, on my 18th birthday, I went got a tattoo and came home and sat. Why? Because everyone that was supposed to hang out with me ditched me. So this weekend, I see the same thing happening. Oh wait, people are already ditching me and my birthday isn't even here yet. So its official, I hate birthdays.

I can see clearly now

we have been friends for 12 years.
he has been a boyfriend for 2 weeks.
i can definitely see where he is more important then me.

To Whom it May Concern

You should probably just forget about me completely. I mean you pretty much have already haven't you? It seems like it. I thought that you would want to hang out when you come home. I knew you would make new friends, but I didn't think you would be so busy that you wouldn't be able to spend one day with me. I should have seen this coming, but with me, I always have false hope. I hoped that things would stay the same, but now I see that is not true. So when it is convenient for you, please let me know and we can try this "friend" thing on your watch.



love,
your once best friend.

Sunday night delight

Tonight I was taken back to a place in time where I felt so alive. So at peace with everything, like nothing in the world could go wrong. I hadn't felt like this for over a year. It all felt so right. Everyone was there for the same reason and we were all one. I was with people with whom no matter how much they piss me off, I will always love. Their energy was like they were playing to 1000 kids when in reality they were playing to 60. Its a feeling that can make any gray day turn blue. I will be forever grateful for great live music and wonderful people that can do this to me.

He is so damn destructive.

I hate when a boy tells me he loves me and that i am the one for him but then goes and tells some other girl that he misses talking to them and it makes him sad that they havent talked for a day or two and wants her to call him so that they can talk. or he tells the girl that she didnt answer his phone call and now he is sad because talking to her is the best part of his day. Now, to me that doesn't make sense. Just pick a damn girl and stay true to your word. Dont go tell me i am the most beautiful girl in the world and turn around and tell some other girl the same thing. I have been fed lies for the past year and i am sick of it, i dont want it to happen again. i thought maybe you would be different, but i guess im just attracted to the boys who dont know what they want and love to lie to me.

You fall under this too.

Stories, lies and fake alibis.
That is all anyone is anymore.

pics of jamaica, grand cayman and cozumel