Adam Lambert.

Not the greatest pictures due to my camera sucking, but oh my goodness.  The way this boy moves.  Wow.  Thats all I have to say.  He is purely amazing beyond belief. 

 

Sleep.

I wish it came easier for me.  Advil and Tylenol PM do nothing for me.
Insomnia is a bitch.

Will I?

Every single word that comes out of your mouth is a lie.  I'm so sick of it.  I let my heart go back to thinking you were the one.

When did I become so naive with things in life?  As I sit here writing this, I am giving a friend relationship advice.  I seem to be able to give good advice but can never follow it myself.  I wish someone would slap some sense into me.  I need to be shook and screamed at.  I need a huge ass wake-up call.  I thought I got one this summer, but I guess it wasn't big enough.  When will I learn?  Will I learn?

Theme Songs

This weeks theme songs are That Phone by Grace Potter & The Nocturnals and All We'd Ever Need by Lady Antebellum. 

First Day.

Today was the first day of my senior year of college.  I wish I could say it was my last year of school, unfortunately it's not.  But oh well.  Pushes the real world off a bit longer.

My two classes were fine.  My night class that was supposed to be three hours was only 45 min.  This cute old man teaches it.  I kind of wanted to go hug him at times.

I'm kind of proud of myself.  I wore shorts to class for the first time since 8th grade.  Thats right, it has been 7 years since I have worn shorts to school.  I finally got over my fear of my legs.  Yay for me!

What?!

Next year I am sure not so funny man, Mitchell Davis, will be on this list.  

This is ridiculous.  These people make money because they sit at home in front of their computer screen for hours on end and act stupid.  

I'm glad I have to spend 20 grand a year to get a degree so that I can make less money in a year then all these people made.

http://finance.yahoo.com/tech-ticker/meet-the-youtube-stars-making-100000-plus-per-year-535349.html?tickers=goog,%5Eixic,qqqq

UNI & TOMS Shoes

This is just one of the reasons I love my school.  TOMS Shoes is finally making an appearance!  I will be attending each of these events even though they result in me missing a few classes.  Reeeaaaaalllllyyyy don't care.  Maybe I can sweet talk someone and get myself into a Shoe Drop (dream big!).  Gah, seriously can not wait.

Beat on the Brat

Its a good day today.  The sun is shining, my air is off and there is a small breeze coming through my window.  I think I am going to start looking at the world with a more positive outlook.  I am sick of feeling down.  There is a whole great world out there waiting for me.  So I am going to go get it!  It's definitely a Clash and Ramones kind of day.     :)

Yepp.

I wrote a blog a few years back about someone.  Re-reading it, all the emotions came back.  I write blogs for a reason and probably should just listen to myself when I write them.  I mean every word I ever write.  I mean them for a reason.  I am seeing that now.




So freaking frustrated with people right now.

Music to My Ears

I am in need of new music.  Too bad I only have $4.59 left on my account.

This is the list that I want:

The Features
Ryan Keen
Amelia Curran
Keith and  Renee
Beth Thronley
Bahamas
Kate Miller-Heidke
Zach Berkman

Lost.

She has it.
He has it.
They have it.
I don't.
I feel like I never will.
<3 vs nothing

Today.

Today has been a good day. I woke up with a smile on my face. This usually does not happen, I knew it was going to be a good day. I was lucky to have lunch with two of my favorite ladies ever, my mom and Jill. Jill will always be like a mom to me. She is so cute and loves me to death. She told me that I am to "Never divorce me! No matter what happens with you and him. Plus, I had you first!". I told her I never would even think about doing such a thing because I loved her too much to do such a thing. After a great lunch, momma and I went grocery shopping. Today I didn't mind it so much. Quality time with the one who loves me the most is something I take for granted sometimes. A great dinner and soon a movie with the family. I will miss days like this when I leave for school again tomorrow. I'm glad it ended on a great day. I love my life sometimes :)

New apt boredom.

Would you ever try Fear Factor for one million dollars? Why or why not?

Negative. I can't stomach half the things they have to do.

If you have a camera, when do you use flash?

When need be.

What would you do with eighty-three crazy straws?

Oh man, have a killer crazy straw party.

If you use hair spray, what brand do you use the most?

Tresemme

Is Catcher in the Rye in your library by any chance?

It used to be. I can't find my copy.

What are your views on recreational fishing?

Its super fun.

What if there was no such thing as the word 'one'?

Then I would never have to hear "He is the ONE" or "She is the ONE"

What do you have automatic sympathy for?

Skin diseases.

What is a cool disposable object?

Everything.

Hilary Duff or Lindsay Lohan? Why?

H. Duff people tend to confuse the two of us.

What is the best thing about a Barbie doll?

Ken.

What is something you'd say in your will?

Lauren gets first pick.

Any thoughts on fake abortion clinics?

Fake abortion? Where are these? Either way abortion is stupid and I am totally against it.

To be or not to be. Is that the question?

Maybe for some.

What was a username you'd thought wouldn't be taken but was taken?

Slmjim i just added the 1221 to the end of it to make it miiiine. Got to love 7th grade track nicknames.

Cherry or peanut ice cream?

Peanut with chocolate.

What is your dream cellphone? Why?

Any phone with a better internet, doesn't lose battery after 2 hours, and that doesnt turn off when you touch the screen.

Would you rather be watching The Bachelor or The Bachelorette?

Both are drama filled and fun to watch.

From one to ten, how big of a movie buff are you?

Fiveish, give or take a few numbers.

Who is a celebrity you think will never get into trouble?

Goody goody T, Swift. The worst she has done so far is dump T. Launter. maybe he dumped her, but whatever.

What is an important holiday to you? Why?

Christmas due to the fact that the whole family gets together. Thats rare in my family.

Name a catty girl you really dislike.

I don't name drop in these situations.

What is a museum you would like to go to?

Holocaust.

Personally, do you look better with short hair or long hair?

Eh not sure. I love long hair but I probably look better with medium length.

What was the reason why you last blocked a person from your IM?

I haven't used a form of IM for a long time. I don't think I have even blocked someone before. I just don't respond back simple as that.

What is a cliche thing that happens a lot in anime?

Those little tear drops above the people? I don't watch anime.

What are your views on the cartoon show Invader Zim?

Huh?

If you have some, what is tonight's homework about?

Its summer, son.

If you have one, what is your favorite sushi flavour?

Nasty.

What is the first thing you think of when I say 'Jack'?

Dawson. Titanic, people. come on!

Do you understand JavaScript coding?

Not even in the slightest.

What would you do if you found a gun in your best friend's bedroom?

"Haha is this for when J gets out of hand and doesn't do what you asked?"

What do you call your grandparents?

Grandma

When I say 'Go', you say:

Stop.

What colour do you usually paint your nails?

Black

What would be a cool earring design?

I love anchors but they make those already.

What do you think of raccoons?

Nasty.

Any thoughts on the actor Paul Rudd?

I liked him in Friends and will he ever do a serious or love roll?

Who is the better liar: your mother or your best friend?

Haha L can lie out of her ass!! Proud of her for it too.

Are breast implants something you'd consider? Why or why not?

Nah, my no-boobs will do.

Besides nightmares, what is the scariest thing about sleeping?

The noises in the dark.

Do you find the phrase 'nom nom nom' annoying?

Yes. Damn scene kids use it too much.

Do you look better with red lipstick or black lipstick?

Never worn red, black was hideous and pink looks great.

When was the last time you had chocolate milk?

Never. I hate milk.

Summer 2010 Recap

I had a pretty decent summer.


~Started summer off making dope music videos with the one and only L~



~Took some sexy pictures in the porn affect on Photo Booth~



~Pressure Drop 1 came and went~



~Spent a weekend in Cedar Falls for a friends wedding~




~Babysat my favorite 2 year old in the entire world~



~Chilled with some pretty awesome people~

~Grilled out with a few of my favorite people~



~Watched my brother compete against the best~



~Partied in Cedar Falls night one~



~Night two. Dance party/total shit show~



~Checked out flood damage with K~



~Celebrated the 4th by watching parachuters, playing bocce ball, and watching fireworks~





~The 4th on the 11th with my favorite ladies~



~Took too many pictures of myself~



~Went and saw Vertical Horizon and Sons of Sylvia~






~Pressure Drop 2 was a major success~







~Cleaned and moved out of #232~



~Last night at home = Cowboys Never Die shirt due to all my clothes being packed~



I am sure I missed some vital fun times. But this is the gist of it all.

August 1, 2010

Tomorrow I move back to Cedar Falls.
Starting another new chapter in my life.
I completely moved out of my old apartment yesterday.
A lot of memories there...Dance parties, drinking, Ryan, weird laugh dude, stressful teaching projects, bitchy two faced roommates, awkward moments with bartender in the kitchen, late night movie nights, JD, Laying on the floor with Rachel for two hours too drunk to go to class, horrible cleaning days, doors being tried to broken into, Shaun being Ron Jeremy, The Mystery of the BBQ Sauce, creepy sketchy note the night before finals.
Too many good times mixed with too many bad times.
Last year was great.
This year will be better.

Dreams.

That is all they really are. They are what we wish would happen. That we can only hope and pray will happen. We all wish dreams would come true, but we all know they never will. Its just a figment of the imagination that we like to hold onto hoping that one day life will truly end up so wonderful. So wonderful just like we conjured up in our brains while we were warm fast asleep in bed. Wake up precious ones, dreams will never happen.

Xoxo

Don't you hate it when you really need to say something to someone and you plan it out perfectly in your head while your in the shower but you know you will never ever be able to say it to their face?
Yeah, I hate it too.

Oh Leo.

This man never ceases to amaze me.
I am kind of in love with everything he does.

Pressure Drop.

I kind of adore the people that surround me in my life.

My weekends are amazing sometimes.

Watch what you all missed out on!

Yours truly makes a short cameo at :32

It Never Gets Easier

"All I really need to find is one short clever line to pinpoint my disgust its always just too much or not enough"

I am addicted to this song. Its so spot on for my life right now.

Cover What You Can

This is your fault Lauren. I wanted to go to bed, then I lurked your damn blog.

Another one coming tomorrow!

Got to love surveys.

Be honest, who texted you last? - JD

Do you sleep with the door open or closed? - Slightly Cracked

Did anyone see your last kiss? - Maybe the neighbors

Do you drink tea? - Iced

Have you ever kissed someone older than you? - Yes, all the time.

Do you have plans for tomorrow? - Working.

What’s worse: dry skin or chapped lips? - Chapped lips

Would you be surprised if your parents had another baby together? - I would throw up.

Would you rather go to Canada or California on vacation? - California

Do you want to get married? - In the future, yes.

Are you wearing jeans, shorts, sweatpants or pajama pants? - Old cheerleading shorts

So, what if you married the last person you texted? - We had planned on getting married once...

Last person you told a secret to? - Lauren probably.

What are you listening to at the moment? - One More Day by Lydia

Where was the last place you fell asleep other than your bed? - Jeff's bed.

Is there someone that you believe you will always be attached to? - Lauren, my grandpa, my mom and a select few others.

Are relationships ever really worth it? - Yes, no matter how bad they may seem at the time.

Do you believe in love? - Yes.

When was the last time you saw your father? - A few hours ago.

Have any memories that you’d like to forget? - Like seeing my father almost die? Yes.

Is there someone you really like to hang out with and just talk about stuff? - Lauren, Kenzie, Mom.

Have you ever been called prince or princess? - My mom calls me princess.

Do you think teenagers can be in love? - Not if we are talking 14 and 15 but 18 and 19, yes.

How fast does your mood change? - In the blink of a freaking eye.

Do you have any condoms in your room? - In my apartment room, not this room.

Do you need to say anything to someone?- Just some guy in Des Moines that needs an ass kicking. (This is Lauren's answer, but it fits oh so well)

Remember the first time you kissed the last person you kissed? - Mhmm, that I do.

How are you feeling? - Tired.

Do you want someone to call you right now? - No, its bed time.

What do you always take with you? - Chapstick and phone.

Is your bed comfortable? - You bet.

Would you say you’re an understanding person? - At times, yes.

Are you generally a happy person? - Yes.

Who’s in your profile picture with you? - Me, myself and I.

Were you single on Valentines Day? - Nope.

What is the last movie you watched? - Shutter Island.

Do you listen to songs when you’re done? - When I'm done doing what?

How long does it take you to fall asleep at night? - Far too long some nights.

Are you talkative? - Nope.

Next vacation you’re going on? I'm not privileged enough to go on vacations.

Were you single last summer? Yep yep!

-----

I have so many blogs saved in my edit folder from the past week.

I can't seem to bring myself to post any of them.

This has become such a boring blog.

I need to keep up with it.

I always feel better whenever I post something.

Even if its something pointless...

Like this.

Music Wednesday

Bands that I think you must check out because they make me feel good...

or because summer wouldn't be the same without them.

-Here We Go Magic

-Twin Sister

-Indian Jewelry

-Wolf Parade

-FM Belfast

-Junip

-Drake

-Katy Perry

-Peter Tosh

-Rancid

Love this kid

True friends never really leave in soul and spirit. Anton and I hadn't seen each other in over a year and a half. Get us back together and its just like old times. I love it!

Spring Break 2007 in Good Ole Pella!

Summer 2010 Grill Out at Red Rock!

New

The new chapter in my life is going to be amazing.

Positive outlook on life starts now.

I love the few friends I have in my life, they are amazing.

3 years.

The hardest part about closing a chapter on your life is comprehending how much it really effected your life. Over the past three years I went through an emotional roller coaster. Ups and downs along the way. Some of the best times in my life and some of the worst times in my life. It was a three year relationship that I thought could conquer anything. A three year relationship that would continue for many years to come. Then, two days ago he closed the book. So, I have to learn how to deal with the chapter being over and realizing there is no more to the chapter. Its done. No one will write more in it. The author ended it.


I can no longer:

Listen to When You're Gone, Sit and Sink, Konstantine, Hey Soul Sister, or Boston without a tear forming in the corner of my eye.
Cook grilled cheese.
Order Cheese Bread.
Play Phase 10 or Mad Gab.
See an Illinois license plate and keep my cool.
Drink Bud Light.
Look at a baseball and not think of him.
Forget all the hurtful words said to me.
Say 'I love you' so easily.
Believe what someone tells me.

Pro vs. Con

I made a Pro and Con list once.
It was right.
They are probably one of the best things to do.

Fact:

In 2009, 97,751 albums were released. Only 12 sold over a million.

Dear Diary

I found an old Diary from freshman year and on Wednesday October 22, 2003 part of the entry went like this...

OMG OMG OMG
I forgot, John Mayer is coming to Iowa. Liz & I have been trying to win tickets to his concert off of KISS 107.5 fm. No luck so far. They are also giving a trip to see him @ Madison Square Garden in New York. Nope. No luck there either.



Little did I know, 7 years later I would finally get to see him. I didn't even have to try and win the tickets off the radio this time!

May 21 2010

I love nights like tonight.
My best friend is amazing.

[Title Here]

I wish you would quit making it so hard and yet so easy for me to get over you.
Keeping on the straight and narrow is the way I live life. I go home alone every night.
You keep it on the wide and crazy. You, you probably never go home alone at night.
I had you and let you go because I had trust issues. Actions are proving time and time again that I made the right choice.
You do things just to make me mad. I try my hardest to not let them upset me.
It doesn't work. You win.
You win every time.
I broke your heart once, you break mine everyday.
I try to tell you not to make mistakes and you think I am stupid and reply with only an 'ugh'.
I gave myself to you, something I promised myself I wouldn't do unless I knew the person was the one.
Tell me I didn't care, I gave up something very dear to me. Tell me I don't care.
I loved you.
I really did.
You've changed. I've grown older. We don't seem to be on the same path as before.
I shed tears.
More then I should.
I think that shows I care.

As Alanis Morrisett said...

"It was a slap in the face how quickly I was replaced and are you thinking of me when you fuck her"

I need to

scream
cry
punch something
drink
blare really good hardcore music
think
and start over

Ha!

"In life some people trip, but most people fall. And some people turn that trip into a beautiful dance."
Some of the things John Mayer says just kind of makes me smile and giggle.
Why the hell is he on some lame ass skate boarders reality show on MTV right now?
Kind of confused.
Ooohhhh never mind, they are going to a club to get women.
Got it now.

Back in the Day

My best friend and I used to refer to each other as Brooklyn and Jersey because of this movie.
I miss those days.

Denmark

I kind of am proud to say I have part of you running through my veins...
check them out.


New Politics.

New Music Tuesday

I was only able to purchase:
Minus The Bear - Omni -- this band never fails. amazing. check it.

But I also want:
The New Pornographers - Together
Josh Ritter - So Runs the World Away
William Fitzsimmons - Derivatives
Greg Laswell - Take a Bow

Excited

For Tulip Time on Friday and a Girls Day sometime next week. School is over in 24 hours and its time to celebrate with:
Funnel cakes, old friends and relaxation time!

Childhood Memories

I used to listen to this song over and over when I was little.

I always wanted a 'Tall Paul'

Calm Down

THIS IS IN RESPONSE TO MY RANTIN MAJOR BLOG:

Seems my blog that I wrote in about five minutes because I was upset that I had not been able to do fun things for awhile due to school, is causing some uproar.

Not going to lie, I find it amusing.

I did not say "every single person in my town only drinks beer and is only friends with people who drink and does not care about school"

In fact, I know a few awesome people who go to school, are serious about it, and still find time to party during finals.

I am jealous of them. I can not do that. No matter how much my body tells me to just go have fun, my mind won't let me.

So, before everyone goes and gets their panties in a bunch, just take a breath. It will be okay. They were just my opinions at that moment. This is what blogspot is for. To write about what you feel. I wrote what I felt. You can disagree with me, just know that I tend to write things in the moment and disagree with them down the road.

I am allowed to do this.

Discouraged

So I did my first group interview ever at Bath & Body Works the other day. I did not get the job. Why? I have no real reason, but I have my ideas.

1. I have a tattoo
2. I have a facial piercing
3. I did not work at Shags and make it sound like I am the most awesome girl to ever walk the planet.

It is against their codes to have piercings and tattoos. This is not 1952, its 2010. More then half the population of twenty some year olds have tattoos. You can not discriminate against something that is so common in society.

Another thing, group interviewing is completely pointless. What can a manager get out of...

"My name is ________. I am 21 years old. A soon to be senior majoring in Elementary Education and Early Childhood Education. I am very fun and easy going and I love my music. I have worked at Hy Vee and a Teen Club, so I have worked with all sorts of costumers. I got to know all my customers and knew what they wanted when they walked in the door. I think I would work great at Bath & Body because I love to help people and think it would be a great place to grow within a company."

Wanting to know our names, age, schooling and one sentence about why we would be good at a job is nothing to go off of. One can not really get to know a person from 6 short sentences they say about themselves. What I got from the other 6 people there...well nothing. I could not tell you which one would work great at B&B. All I got was two were psych majors, one was a liberal arts major, one an education major and two were out of college. Oh and one of the girls thinks she is all that because she worked at Shags.

If they were to do a real interview they would have found out more about each one of us. They would have been able to see that I am definitely qualified to work at their store. I am just very upset with the whole interview process done at Bath & Body works. Just does not seem right.

I have never been to an interview that the manager doing the hiring wanted to know the most pointless information about us. The information we gave mostly had nothing to do with working.

I kind of hope I never have to do a group interview again. If I do, I hope the questions are more job related then personal life related.

Life is Unfair.

Why is it bad things happen to good people?

I can not seem to grasp what has been going on to some of the nicest and best people that I have met.
They are all very strong people, so I know they will get through it all. I just think it is so unfair.

cancer
cancelled future
car crash
death of a mom & dad

R-A-N-T M-A-J-O-R

Yesterday my mom and I were looking at my yearbook, finding people, then facebook stalking them. I came to a realization that I already knew, but for some reason really became present yesterday. I am one of the only people from my whole town that doesn't either: go to the bar every other night or get drunk every night. All the kids who hated each other in high school now hang out because they have nothing else to do but drink beer. Its sad that friendships in the town are based around beer. Kids couldn't make it in college so they come back home, get fat and waste their lives away.
I have my priorities straight and my life half way in order. The past two weeks I have been studying my ass off for finals because I am serious about my future and want good things to happen in my life. The rest of the world is out at the bars, or partying in living rooms. I have my nose in a book and they have their mouths around a beer bottle. I feel like I have no time to eat, breathe, or sleep, let alone go out get drunk and mingle with people who I could really care less about.
Sometimes I wish that I was able to put school off and act as if it were no big deal. I can't though. I see where the world is going and for kids my age, its not going somewhere good. To get a job once I graduate will be close to impossible, even with a degree. It used to be if you had a degree there were more then enough jobs to go around. Now, a degree almost means nothing. However, if I am working towards a degree, I might as well get it with the feeling of satisfaction of knowing I did my best to earn it. That the thousands upon thousands of dollars I spent were not wasted by getting Cs in all my classes due to my irresponsibleness of drinking every night.
Maybe I was just brought up different. I was brought up in a household where school was important and the party scene wasn't. I think I am grateful for that. It will take me far in life.


Anyways, that was my rant for the day. Time to study more. Hope you all enjoy your beer :)

Things I should say to your face.

"I'll burn her out of Cedar Falls" "Yeah dude you should definitely do that" Haha okay hunny, you do that. You met once at a show and that makes you best friends for life huh? Well damn, if that is the case I have a ton of BFFs that I was unaware of.

Really, talking shit about me on Facebook? I guess if it makes you feel better about yourself, go for it. I have people in my life so much better then that. I deserve better then that.

I'm retarded, huh? Okay, if thats what you really think. Friday you wanted me in your life sooooo bad and still wanted to be with me and on Sunday I am retarded. Make up your mind, bro.

I'm all about being friends with ex's. I make it work. If you want to ruin it, go for it. Its your loss, not mine.

Untag all the pictures you want, but I've seen them. They pop up in the news feed right when you're tagged. Untagging won't make them go away. The trust is still lost, and getting more and more lost by the day.

You know, I tried to be nice yesterday by saying I think its great you decided to do what you love. What do I get in reply? Not a thing. You still must have been on the whole "BURN ME OUT OF CEDAR FALLS" "GIRLS ARE RETARDED" stage.

I hope you grow a pair soon. It would be a waste to throw a 3 year friendship out the window completely.

It's Cool We Can Still Be Friends

"You say that that I've hurt you, and your voice is like a prayer Yeah, well maybe I hurt you some, but let's contrast and compare. Lift up your shirt, the wound isn't there. I guess your truth is just a ghost of your lies, I see through them all the time“

Great.

Tyler HIlton's Books for Kids <--- Visit it.
I admire stars/musicians who use their status to do great things.

All Hail the Heartbreaker

If there were a profession in heartbreaking, I think I would qualify for it without any question.

Music.

An update that is far past overdue.

The Spill Canvas - Realities
She & HIm - Volume 2
Dr Dog - Dr Dog
Jason Castro - Jason Castro
Jakob Dylan - Women and Country
MGMT - Congratulations

I am sure there are many others that I have missed. Thats what I get for being a super poor college student.

April 8th, 2010

Sooner or later in life everyone discovers that perfect happiness is unrealizable, but there are few who pause to consider the antithesis: that perfect unhappiness is equally unattainable. The obstacles preventing the realization of both these extreme states are of the same nature: they derive from our human condition which is opposed to everything infinite. Our ever-insufficient knowledge of the future opposes it: and this is called, in the one instance, hope, and in the other, uncertainty of the following day. The certainty of death opposes it: for it places a limit on every joy, but also on every grief. The inevitable material cares oppose it: for as they poison every lasting happiness, they equally assiduously distract us from our misfortunes and make our consciousness of them intermittent and hence supportable.

--Primo Levi, Survival in Auschwitz

Perhaps Neither.

Not sure what to listen to. My heart or my head. Both seem to screw me over these days.

Confess.

Ten Things I Wish I Could Say to Ten Different People. (but don't say their name)

1. One of these days will be the day it happens. You will see what you've been missing.
2. I was lost for a few months without you. I'm glad you're back.
3. I am sorry for what has happened and what will happen.
4. Next year!!!
5. You'll never get your life together, for a certain girl in your life, I wish you would.
6. I never thought you would be first, but you are and I am super happy.
7. Thank you for everything.
8. I miss you.
9. You annoy the fuck out of me.
10. I am super proud of you.

Nine things about myself:

1. i love to travel.
2. i don't forgive easily.
3. i love my punk rock music.
4. i like driving around listening to music
5. i sleep with a stuffed animal.
6. i hate talking on the phone.
7. i have huge dreams.
8. i want to live in a big city.
9. i love that I am 21.

Eight ways to win my heart.

1. Good taste in music
2. Respect
3. Good Laugh.
4. Love me for who I am.
5. Love to travel.
6. Will tell me how it is.
7. Is intelligent and reads books.
8. Go on walks with me.


Seven things that cross my mind a lot.

1. What is wrong with me?
2. What is wrong with him?
3. Summer travels.
4. I need a job.
5. I need out of this state.
6. Africa.
7. Ugggghhhh

Six things I do before I fall asleep

1. Plug in my phone.
2. Brush the teeeeeth.
3. Drink water.
4. Put on chap stick.
5. Listen to music.
6. Check facebook.

Five people who mean a lot. (in no order whatsoever)

1. Lauren.
2. Mom.
3. Kenzie.
4. Grandma
5. My other close friends


Four things you're wearing right now.

1. Jeans
2. Tank top
3. Sweater thing.
4. Toms

Three songs that you listen to often.

1. Guns of Brixton - The Clash
2. Slow Dancing in a Burning Room - John Mayer
3. Anything by Lady Gaga or Adam Lambert.

Two things you want to do before you die.

1. Travel the World
2. Skydive

One confession.

1. I say I regret nothing, but I do. About two things in life.

My life.

Living on a diet of chocolates and cigarettes

I wanna call you again.

I'll drink tea sometimes when its cold, its getting old.

I call you again.

Still too young to fail, too scared to sail away

One of these days

I'll grow old and I'll grow brave and I'll go

One of these days.

Blowing out the candles from my cake

I choke on the smoke as I look around the room

Everybody is wishing for no more mistakes

And all that I can think about is you

Still too young to fail, too scared to sail away

One of these days

I'll grow old and I'll grow brave and I'll go

One of these days

Chocolate and Cigarettes by Angus & Julia Stone

It's true. One of these days I will grow old and brave and go. I really will. Right now I'm scared and afraid that I would fail if I went there. With all my might I would make it not fail, but all my might has never been quite enough. To go there, I would need more then my might. To go there, I would have to take a giant leap of faith and not fall in the process. One of these days though, I will be brave enough and you will see me sailing to where I am supposed to be.

A long, long time ago...

I was able to model for my cousin whenever we felt like it. I really miss those days.

Wakey!Wakey!

This song is one of my favorites at the moment.

The lyrics are so true.

I have thought this many times in my life.

Quote of the week.

"If a guy you like doesn't like punk rock, say fuck him."

Sometimes my friends have great quotes. Sometimes my friends keep me sane. Sometimes my friends just completely know whats up.

Photos by Laurennnn

Perfect.

Everyone always looks forward to Spring Break. People spend thousands on flights, hotels, new swimsuits, fake nails, horrible fake tans and whatever else is necessary for a disease filled break in Florida. I however, am so far from any of this. My spring breaks are never filled with booze, sun and MTV.

I would have to say this Spring Break has been on of the best so far. Although I have done not much of anything, it ranks in the top 3 best spring breaks. It started Saturday with a shopping spree and pedicures with my mother. Mother-Daughter time with us is very rare these days. I am so glad that I have a mom who is also like a best friend. We have so much fun together. I am so happy I have her and could not be more thankful for her.

Monday morning started off with a little jog on the treadmill and then off to pick up one of my favorite people in the world. My little brown eyed, brown haired cutie. I had not hung out with her since January 4th. One would never know that much time had passed between our last time seeing each other. We always pick up right where we left off. That is how I know she is my everything and I would be no where without her. We made fun of ourselves because we bought things from PacSun and spent way too much on MAC makeup. It was all worth it though. We spent half the day drinking drinks, at every stop we made. One of us probably had about 100 ounces of caffeine in us by the end of the night. We then made a stop that was far too long over due. We went to the boys house who once ran to L.A. but is now back in lil Des Moines. Good times were had by all.

We woke up somewhere all too different yet all too familiar. We had our long talks of the future and what life should really be like for the both of us. Driving home at 8:30 in the morning is something I am not used to but it all felt so refreshing. The rest of the day was spent lounging, grocery shopping, making food and talking to trans-atlantic boyfriends. Couldn't have been more perfect.

Wednesday came and went. Lunch with my grandma and chilling with my mom.

Thursday is here and the weather couldn't be more amazing. It is a day for swinging, listening to music far too loud and burning the incense.

It is weird that I have yet been to Pella during this break. The past few years, Lauren and I always make a trip down there. It is kind of nice not going there. :)

Tomorrow = dress shopping for Kenzie's wedding, Ice cream from Jersey Freeze, and the boy coming to see me.

Perfect Spring Break this year? I would say so.

March 4th, 2010

This is who I saw this weekend.
I had not been to an amazing show in quite sometime. Michael Franti was amazing. So much energy and so loving. John Mayer blew my mind. Such a talented guy. He is one of the best artists that I have seen live, ever. There are only a handful of bands that sound just as they do on the album, meaning they have raw talent. John is definitely one of those select few.

-Neither of these videos were filmed from me because I was a good girl and obeyed the rules and didn't bring my camera. Wish I would have though because they didn't care. Both of them however are from the show I attended.

8 Total

I am kind of a big Apolo Ohno fan.
He's on Jay Leno tonight. Pretty excited!

Lacking

On the posts.
I have nothing to write about. No, actually I have a ton to write about. Just nothing I want any of you to actually read. Because well, it might be about you. Or maybe because I just don't want you to know about it.
Either way, I hope to starting writing and posting more again soooooon.